I have a confession. A deep, dark, dirty little secret. And I know you have the same one, you dirty birdy!
PS- This video is a little saucy. You might not want to watch it with your life suckers.
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You ever get that itch? That burning desire deep, deep down? That yearning you just have to act on? Yeah, me too. I resist it most of the time, but sometimes, when the feelings get too strong, I give in.
And I go to Target.
Every time I pull into the parking lot, I swear I can hear my wallet saying, “Don’t go in there, lady!” To which I say, “F U, wallet. This is something I have to do. For me. For my sanity. And also we’re out of toilet paper.”
It had been a while since my last visit to Target. But with the changing seasons, the buds blooming on the trees, I yearned for Target again. I started fantasizing about all the cute maxi dresses and cover ups and flip flops they probably have in stock. And you know as well as I do, if you don’t get to Target right at the beginning of the season, you’re screwed. All the good stuff is gone.
So I started to cultivate an excuse. A reason I had to go to Target. I lied to myself. I said we need summer clothes. (We don’t.)
I picked up my son from preschool, and you might judge me, but I’m not ashamed to admit I took him with me.
When I walked into the store all those old feelings came rushing back. I felt alive in the glow of the neon lights. I rushed over to the accessories section and I could feel the blood coursing through my veins. All those cute hats and handbags. All for under $29. And then I rushed over to the women’s department. I grabbed tank tops and dresses with wild abandon.
Every aisle I turned down there was a bargain just begging, begging to be had . So I filled my cart. I filled it to the tippy top.
We headed to the checkout stand and my wallet almost choked when the cashier said, “$299.00, Ma’am.” But I didn’t care. I handed over my credit card. You can’t put a price on true happiness. Foolish wallet.
As I wheeled my red, oversized cart to my car, I felt calm and relaxed. Satisfied in a way a trip to the grocery store just can’t do.
I’m not going to make a habit out it. My trips to Target. For the sake of my family, my beautiful children and my devoted husband, I’ll only go once in a while. But it’s OK to think about Target in the meantime? Right?