“I Want Your Boobs Back!” Anyone else hear this complaint from their husbands? Mine has been saying it since I first got pregnant eight years ago and my saggy boobs went into time out.
I promised him that when I was done having and nursing babies, he could have them back.
Ever since I peed on that stick, I’ve had a look-don’t-touch policy. Actually, with the state they’re in now, it’s more of a don’t-look-don’t-touch policy.
I stopped nursing over two years ago, so I don’t really have a legit excuse anymore. But I don’t know … it’s like my boobs have been baby-fied forever and since they found their “real” calling in life they don’t want to go back to their teenage antics. Once you view your breasts as baby feeding machines, it’s hard to see them as sexual objects again.
That fine line between mother and wife is often a tough one to walk. It’s hard to feel sexy when you’re covered in spit up and so tired your bones are weeping. It’s hard to want to be caressed and touched by your husband when you’ve been mauled all day long by little demanding tyrants who have no boundaries when it comes to your body. After a day of being sat on, tugged on, licked, bitten, hugged, snuggled, punched—you name it—the last thing you want is to be touched by another human being.
I know this state of “don’t touch my boobs” isn’t sustainable. I do want to rekindle the romance with my husband. I want to give my boobs back to him. And I will. Promise. Just as soon as the kids move out.